My birthday is a stressful time for me. I usually end up spending the actual day alone for fear that having people around will just allow them to screw it up. However, back in high school, my good friend Yvonne—now all grown up and the genius behind the hugely successful breakfast restaurant Yvonne’s in Oregon City—made me a batch of mini cheesecakes for my birthday party; and birthdays have at least been a little tastier since I got the recipe off her.
Crust :
Two packages honey graham crackers; pulverized
1/2 c tightly packed brown sugar
2 tsp vanilla
1 stick melted butter
1/4 tsp powdered ginger (optional)
Mix thoroughly, then press into muffin cups. Make sure to pack it tightly into the cups. You’re aiming for the crust to be about a quarter inch when it’s all packed in. It can still be a little crumbly even after it’s been baked, so if you want to make the cheesecakes easier to eat, I recommend using cupcake wrappers. Once packed, bake the crusts at 350 degrees for 5 to 10 minutes until they turn a slightly darker golden brown color. While those are in the oven, we can mix up the cheesecake.
Cheesecake :
2 sticks cream cheese, soft
1 stick butter, soft
2 eggs, room temp
1 c sugar
2 tsp vanilla
1/2 lemon, juiced
Mix cream cheese and butter together until smooth consistency is achieved. If you’re using a mixer, Yvonne recommends the lowest setting. I did it by hand and managed to get it mixed pretty well. Make sure the butter and cream cheese mixed together completely before proceeding. Then add in the eggs, sugar, vanilla, and lemon juice and mix until uniform. Be careful not to overmix! If too much air is incorporated into the batter the texture will be off.
Once the cheesecake batter is done, spoon it into the baked crusts. You’ll want to fill each cup about two-thirds of the way full, and then bake them again for another 10 to 15 minutes at 350 degrees until the center is set. Once the cheesecakes come out of the oven, top with your favorite pre-cooked, cornstarch thickened pie filling and enjoy! I’m partial to the Oregon triple berry myself.
Two packages honey graham crackers; pulverized
1/2 c tightly packed brown sugar
2 tsp vanilla
1 stick melted butter
1/4 tsp powdered ginger (optional)
Mix thoroughly, then press into muffin cups. Make sure to pack it tightly into the cups. You’re aiming for the crust to be about a quarter inch when it’s all packed in. It can still be a little crumbly even after it’s been baked, so if you want to make the cheesecakes easier to eat, I recommend using cupcake wrappers. Once packed, bake the crusts at 350 degrees for 5 to 10 minutes until they turn a slightly darker golden brown color. While those are in the oven, we can mix up the cheesecake.
Cheesecake :
2 sticks cream cheese, soft
1 stick butter, soft
2 eggs, room temp
1 c sugar
2 tsp vanilla
1/2 lemon, juiced
Mix cream cheese and butter together until smooth consistency is achieved. If you’re using a mixer, Yvonne recommends the lowest setting. I did it by hand and managed to get it mixed pretty well. Make sure the butter and cream cheese mixed together completely before proceeding. Then add in the eggs, sugar, vanilla, and lemon juice and mix until uniform. Be careful not to overmix! If too much air is incorporated into the batter the texture will be off.
Once the cheesecake batter is done, spoon it into the baked crusts. You’ll want to fill each cup about two-thirds of the way full, and then bake them again for another 10 to 15 minutes at 350 degrees until the center is set. Once the cheesecakes come out of the oven, top with your favorite pre-cooked, cornstarch thickened pie filling and enjoy! I’m partial to the Oregon triple berry myself.
These cheesecakes are also delightful chilled. I accidentally skipped the secondary baking of the cheesecakes and ended up essentially serving cream and fruit filled graham crackers. Everyone loved them, and they were very tasty, but I would only recommend serving them this way if you intend to eat them quickly. If you don’t bake them, there will still be raw egg in the batter, and if left for longer periods, you run the risk of serving bacteria filled mini cheesecakes—and nobody wants any of that!
Speaking of cheese, this week I wanted to talk about some of my favorite cheesy video game franchises: Devil May Cry and Bayonetta.
Whenever I’m having a tough time, I turn back to these old standbys. Some people deal with bad days by watching a movie or reading something, but I always liked a more hands-on approach. In lieu of actually getting up, going out, and working out my frustrations beating up a punching bag, Dante and Bayonetta of their respective series allow me to work out my bad mood without busting my knuckles, and make me laugh. Nothing says “feel better” quite like bashing in the heads of demons seven ways to Sunday while striking dramatic poses and poking verbal fun at your enemies. These games are dramatic, ridiculous, and completely aware of what they are and so not afraid to play it up—but that’s bound to happen when your main characters are a half demon and an immortal witch.
For reference, let me first mention Bayonetta’s gun high heels—
And then present the first scene of Devil May Cry 3. The game is the third game in the franchise, but the first installment chronologically and functions as a prequel to the first two games. It’s a great starting point for any newcomer as it deals with Dante’s past. The very first thing we see Dante actually do is put his feet up on his desk and knock his phone into his hand with the force of that motion. Crazy, right? Dramatic! Over the top! Well… It gets better:
The action in both games is pretty much like that all the time—part of why they’re so satisfying to play. The over-the-top game play isn’t where it stops, though. Both Dante and Bayonetta are prone to rather good lines. One of my favorite examples is from Devil May Cry 4 where Dante and Agnes (one of the main antagonists of the game and the one responsible for discovering how to combine demon DNA with human DNA to create what his corrupt church are calling “angels”) are nearly quoting Shakespeare at each other. Even though the lines are completely original, the delivery and imagery call out to an over-performed version of Hamlet.
You can tell Dante’s having fun with it, though—which is the very best part. No matter how cheesy the line, both Dante and Bayonetta own it. Even when Capcom let Ninja Theory reboot the series after Devil May Cry 4 with a game called DmC: Devil May Cry, Dante still retained that witty mouth, and even graduated to the level of bad puns.
Bayonetta seems to be above bad puns, but she has an angle that Dante never really satisfied: the possession of her sexuality. Dante may run around in Devil May Cry 3 without a shirt on, but Bayonetta keeps her magic in her hair. This means her hair is stronger than any armor. To be blunt; the woman uses her hair to clothe herself, and isn’t afraid to fit it close to the skin. Devil May Cry does a pretty good job of including women in the story line and not objectifying them even while Dante is a humongous flirt, but Bayonetta owns her sexuality even while pole dancing lances she’s just impaled her enemies on. She’s sexy because she likes it and dramatic for herself. While playing Devil May Cry was always a great way to relieve stress, playing Bayonetta was validating in a way DMC never could be.
Take a look at the first cut scene where the viewer figures out Bayonetta clothes herself in her hair. You’ll notice that even though her clothes are ripped a little during the fight, she’s the one who casts them off, and then she kicks ass even more. What I like about Bayonetta’s nakedness is that it’s something she chooses, and is therefore empowering. It’s not fan service skimped from the character for the viewer’s pleasure without the character’s consent; it doesn’t make her weak or vulnerable or a victim; it’s intentional sensuality on the part of Bayonetta herself that empowers her. And—as with any action game—if something gives you power, you can be sure there’ll be a lot of it in the game.
Bayonetta finishes nearly every fight she has with a “climax.” This is an attack where she uses all of her hair to summon a demon to finish off her enemy. During this attack, Bayonetta is completely naked because she’s using all of her hair and magic to finish her fight. Her nudity is quite literally when she is most powerful. And the best part? The focus of these cut scenes is the carnage, not the curves. For all of the screen time that Bayonetta spends naked, you as the viewer never really see anything except her bare arms and legs.
These three cheesy things always manage to brighten my day, so I hope you’ll enjoy them too. Remember, even the cheesiest of things can be rather amazing.
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